... FOR "DISNEY'S 'MALEFICENT' AND THE FARCE OF THE FEMINIST FAIRY TALE"

"In any event, we know what's really going on in the scene.... It's a symbolic assault with sexual overtones, specifically an attack that occurs after a woman has passed out. Maleficent doesn't just lose her wings; they're stripped from her, against her will."

  — Matt Zoller Seitz, rogerebert.com

"[A]fter the brutal attack, Maleficent quickly retools itself, heading into a whirlwind of tones while ignoring the darker implications of its opening story. In a brisk 97 minutes, decades of narrative are distilled into boilerplate genre elements: The chills of a rape revenge fantasy, the mirth of slapstick, and the adrenaline of action."

  — Monika Bartyzel, Girls On Film

"[W]elcome to Walt Disney's I Spit On Your Grave."

  — Drew McWeeny, HitFix.com

So intoned the critics of Disney's Maleficent, which (so far) has managed to gross over $756 million since opening May 30th. Many reviews, as a matter of fact, touched on this rape-as-metaphor idea in some form or another, to the dismay of many moviegoers/overprotective parents who outright refused to believe that the Mouse House would sneak such subversively sinister material into one of their patented family entertainments. Never mind that Angelina Jolie herself admitted as much during interviews ("The core of [the movie] is abuse, and how the abused have a choice of abusing others or overcoming and remaining loving, open people," she told the BBC on June 10). The cold hard truth is that, from Hans Christian Anderson to Charles Perrault to the Brothers Grimm, even our fondest fairy tales have always been metaphors for something. What matters is how those metaphors are presented to the eyes and ears of anyone old enough to comprehend them.

... FOR "FRANCHISE FACE-OFFS (PART 16 - 'SPIDER-MAN' EDITION)"

The fun of the Spider-Man comics has always been that Peter Parker is intrinsically One of Us. We just may be too modest to admit it. We all feel the awkwardness of our teenage years, we all dream of greater power and responsibility, we all yearn for the courage and the conviction to swoop in and save the day. Swinging through the spires and the skyscrapers of New York City, Peter's world feels grounded in the everyday (well, as "everyday" as a kid in a red-and-blue leotard fighting crime, anyway), and his quips and his wisecracks give him the edge over his enemies, not only stronger and faster but smarter and wittier than they are too. With skills like that, who wouldn't want to be Spider-Man?

Despite his enormous popularity, however, the concept for Stan Lee and Steve Ditko's iconic creation almost didn't make it off the ground. When pitching his initial ideas for the character, Lee recalls that his publisher, Martin Goodman, asked, "Don't you understand what a hero is?" Goodman felt that the idea of a teen-aged superhero - especially a high school nerd who was unpopular with the ladies - wouldn't appeal to readers, since most teens in comic books (think "Bucky" Barnes or Dick Grayson) served only as sidekicks to more experienced crimefighters. Little did he realize that audiences were clamoring for a character they could call their own; unlike Superman, say, with his godlike powers and chiseled physique, or Batman, with his unlimited gadgets and millions of dollars at his disposal, Peter Parker struggled with more conventional problems, like passing his classes or trying to hold down a job. And comic book fans fell immediately in love with him. Spider-Man debuted in Amazing Fantasy #15 in June 1962 and sold in record numbers (in 2011, a near- mint edition of this issue sold for $1.1 million to a private collector). He has since become Marvel's flagship character and company mascot, appearing in multiple comic titles, cartoons, radio plays, movies, books, video games, even a Broadway musical (with music by U2's Bono and The Edge).

... FOR "EXCUSES, EXCUSES" (A BOOK REVIEW OF "THE OFFSPRING," BY R.J. CRADDOCK)

As someone who's tried his hand at writing a novel or two, I can tell you this: it's no easy feat. I barely have the patience (or the brain power) at this point to hammer out a couple nonsensical paragraphs for the blog, let alone 300-500 pages worth. More than that, being able to keep a plot rolling for that long, or characters worth the trouble, is a task so Herculean I can scarcely understand how authors like Stephen King or James Patterson or (heaven forbid) Stephenie Meyer are able to do so on a regular basis. It takes tremendous talent and effort to do what these people do, yet ultimately what binds us together boils down to one simple thing: our obsession with the written word.

Born in Oaka Tamuning, Guam (where her father worked as an art teacher), Ruth "R.J" Craddock has every excuse never to attempt the Next Great American Novel - marriage, kids, housework (and all the exhaustion that entails), not enough hours in the day, you name it. Yet she also suffers from a disability only 17% of the population can claim to share: dyslexia, diagnosed at a very young age. Determined to never let it get the best of her, or define her in any way, Ruth was able to maintain a 4.0 GPA by her sophomore year in high school, and at 29, published her first novel, The Forsaken, Book One in her proposed Children Of Cain series. Now just a year later comes its sequel, The Offspring, a sure sign that her dyslexia has no chance of holding her back. (She joins a select group of dyslexic authors throughout history, including Agatha Christie, Hans Christian Anderson and William Butler Yeats.)

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 50 - 'TANGLED' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: Tangled (2010; based on the fairy tale Rapunzel by the Brothers Grimm)

The Plot: A princess whose hair possesses magical healing powers is imprisoned in a forest tower; on the eve of her 18th birthday, she escapes and experiences life for the first time, with the help of a wayward thief.

The Songs: "Incantation Song," "When Will My Life Begin," "Mother Knows Best," "I've Got A Dream," "I See The Light," "Something That I Want" (performed by Grace Potter)

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 49 - 'THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: The Princess And The Frog (2009; based on the novel The Frog Princess by E. D. Baker, and "The Frog Prince" by the Brothers Grimm)

The Plot: In 1920s New Orleans, a waitress who dreams of opening a restaurant and a pampered, arrogant prince are magically transformed into frogs by a voodoo doctor's curse.

The Songs: "Down In New Orleans," "Almost There," "Friends On The Other Side," "When We're Human," "Gonna Take You There," "Ma Belle Evangeline," "Dig A Little Deeper," "Never Knew I Needed" (performed by Ne-Yo)

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 48 - 'BOLT' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: Bolt (2007)

The Plot: The canine star of a weekly sci-fi TV show, convinced that his superpowers are real, embarks on a cross-country journey to find his "kidnapped" master, with a stray cat and a hamster in tow.

The Songs: "I Thought I Lost You" (performed by Miley Cyrus & John Travolta), "Barking At The Moon" (performed by Jenny Lewis)

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 47 - 'MEET THE ROBINSONS' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: Meet The Robinsons (2007; based on the book A Day With Wilbur Robinson by William Joyce)

The Plot: A 12-year-old orphan with a knack for invention is whisked away on a time-travelling adventure, during which he meets wacky new characters and attempts to correct the mistakes of his past.

The Songs: "Another Believer" (performed by Rufus Wainwright), "Where Is Your Heart At?" and "Give Me The Simple Life" (performed by Jamie Cullum), "Little Wonders" (performed by Rob Thomas), "The Future Has Arrived" (performed by The All-American Rejects), "The Motion Waltz (Emotional Commotion)" (performed by Rufus Wainwright)

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 46 - 'CHICKEN LITTLE' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: Chicken Little (2005; based on the centuries-old folktale)

The Plot: A determined yet diminutive rooster becomes a laughing stock when he accuses the sky of falling, but is later vindicated when an army of UFOs invades his town.

The Songs: "One Little Slip" (performed by Barenaked Ladies), "All I Know" (performed by Five For Fighting), "Shake A Tail Feather" (performed by The Cheetah Girls); all other songs, including "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" (performed by Diana Ross) and "Stir It Up" (performed by Joss Stone and Patti LaBelle) were not written specifically for the film

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 45 - 'HOME ON THE RANGE' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: Home On The Range (2004)

The Plot: Three dairy cows in the Old West set out to capture a notorious cattle rustler and use the reward money to buy back their farm.

The Songs: "(You Ain't) Home On The Range," "Little Patch Of Heaven," "Yodle-Adle-Eedle-Idle-Oo," "Will The Sun Ever Shine Again," "Wherever The Trail May Lead," "Anytime You Need A Friend"

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 44 - 'BROTHER BEAR' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries are also included below.

Title: Brother Bear (2003)

The Plot: In post-ice age North America, an Inuit boy kills a bear as revenge for his brother's death and is transformed into a bear himself.

The Songs: "Great Spirits," "Transformation," "Welcome," "On My Way," "No Way Out (Theme from Brother Bear)," "Look Through My Eyes," "No Way Out (Phil Collins Version)"

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 43 - 'TREASURE PLANET' EDITION)"

Our continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries have also listed below.

Title: Treasure Planet (2002; based on the novel Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson)

The Plot: On a distant planet, a rebellious teen embarks on a quest for a legendary lost treasure, and encounters pirates, mutiny and murder along the way.

The Songs: "I'm Still Here (Jim's Theme)," "Always Know Where You Are"

... FOR "BIG DREAMS AND BOUGAINVILLEA" (AN ALBUM REVIEW OF LUCID 8 AND "AMERICAN EYESORE")

And now for something completely different here at FTWW... a full-on CD review of American Eyesore, debut album from local-band-makes-good Lucid 8. Drummer Jonny has been one of my closest friends for as long as I can remember, and I know he and the guys poured their hearts and souls into the project, so it pleases me to put in a plug for them here. (And, yes, I am fully aware of how self- serving that sounds.) Now excuse me while I try my hardest to sound like a rock critic...

When we're young, we all dream of becoming rock stars. It ranks up there with being a superhero, or an astronaut - surrounded by millions of adoring, screaming fans, worshipping at the altar of your very existence. Yet how many of us actually get to do the things we dream about? Breaking into the music business, believe it or not, can be just as difficult as learning to pilot the space shuttle or adopting super powers. For every artist that makes it, though (Imagine Dragons and fun. [formerly The Format] are recent examples, and even Belgian-Australian singer Gotye dabbled in the avante garde for nearly a decade before gaining international success with "Somebody I Used To Know"), there are literally hundreds who don't - timing, talent, and good old fashioned luck all playing a key factor in any artist's success.

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 42 - 'LILO & STITCH' EDITION)"

My continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries have also been included below.

Title: Lilo & Stitch (2002)

The Plot: An alien programmed for death and destruction is adopted by two orphaned sisters on the island of Kauai.

The Songs: "He Mele No Lilo," "Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride" (performed by Mark Keali'i Ho'omalu and Kamehameha Schools Children's Chorus); "Blue Hawaii," "Heartbreak Hotel," "Hound Dog," "Stuck On You," "Suspicious Minds," "You're The Devil In Disguise" (performed by Elvis Presley); "Burning Love" (performed by Wynonna); "Can't Help Falling In Love" (performed by The A*Teens)

... FOR "IMAGES ('X-MEN' 2000-11 EDITION - PART ONE)"

Some final thoughts on X-Men before we move on to bigger (and brighter?) things. I don't know if these types of posts will follow every Franchise Face-Off from this point on, but these Comic Book movies have definitely sparked my interest as of late. Perhaps this is because both comic books and the cinema are purely a visual medium: It's the images that catch your eye, after all, and if the story connecting them together happens to keep your attention, then so be it. That's just gravy for all those concerned. The best CBMs understand this and deliver on it, twofold.

The X-Men movies, like Batman and Superman before them, have gone through many different permutations over the years, each time trying desperately to please fans of the comic and kowtow to the demands of the cinema. Below, and during the next two X- centric posts, we cover a few examples of how the filmmakers attempted to do both:

... FOR "FRANCHISE FACE-OFFS (PART 15 - 'X-MEN' EDITION)"

If Batman & Robin signaled the death of the Comic Book Movie, then X-Men (2000) is undoubtedly its rebirth - a reverent, star-studded extravaganza that rang the box office bell in ways very few people expected. Sure, there were attempts to revive the genre in between - Blade (1998) springs to mind, starring Wesley Snipes, or Mystery Men (1999), with Ben Stiller and William H. Macy. But those were low-key adaptations of lesser-known characters, not the big-budget, big-name properties fans took to heart.

Consider, too, how the biggest Comic Book films up to that point, Richard Donner's Superman: The Movie (1978) and Tim Burton's Batman (1989), seemed to spawn only Batman and Superman sequels. X-Men opened the floodgates for future box office spectaculars including Spider-Man (2002), Daredevil (2003), Hulk (2003), Fantastic Four (2005), reboots of the Batman and Superman franchises, plus Marvel Comics' Cinematic Universe, culminating in The Avengers (2012) - currently the third highest-grossing film of all time. Superman '78 may have set the template for comic book verisimilitude (Richard Donner was an executive producer on X-Men), but it was X-Men that permanently whet the public's appetite for cinematic superheroics.

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 41 - 'ATLANTIS: THE LOST EMPIRE' EDITION)"

My continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries have also been included below.

Title: Atlantis: The Lost Empire (2001)

The Plot: A linguistics expert and a ragtag team of mercenaries embark on a mission to discover the lost city of Atlantis.

The Songs: "Where The Dream Takes You" (End Title)

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 40 - 'THE EMPEROR'S NEW GROOVE' EDITION)"

My continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries have also been included below.

Title: The Emperor's New Groove (2000; suggested by Hans Christian Andersen's fairy tale The Emperor's New Clothes)

The Plot: The teen-aged emperor of the Inca Empire must learn humility when he's magically turned into a llama and banished from his kingdom.

The Songs: "Perfect World," "My Funny Friend And Me" (End Title)

... FOR "FRANCHISE FACE-OFFS (PART 15 - 'FRANKENSTEIN' EDITION)"

That flat-topped square head. The electrodes that stick out on the sides of his neck like the positive/negative terminals on a car battery. Those tromping, stomping platform boots. At one glance, the monster of James Whale's moody, melancholy Frankenstein (1931) will be instantly recognizable among horror movie aficionados, film history buffs, and to anyone even vaguely aware of the existence of movies. The makeup design by Jack Pierce has become so iconic (it is currently under copyright by Universal Pictures until 2026), and Boris Karloff's performance as the woe begotten creature so definitive, it hardly matters that the character bears little resemblance to Mary Shelley's original novel.

Conjured up by 18-year-old Mary Wollstonecraft Godwin during the summer of 1816 (on a dare from George Gordon Byron and future husband Percy Shelley), Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus, tells the story of Victor Frankenstein, a scientist whose experiments with human tissue result in a living, breathing monstrosity (which he promptly denounces). In the book, Frankenstein's creation is limber, literate and capable of intelligent speech; he exacts a horrific, painstaking revenge. This will no doubt come as a shock to anyone who grew up on a steady diet of Franken Berries, Abbott and Costello, or the "Monster Mash," in which the monster is depicted as lumbering, dim-witted and/or mute. (To be fair, the 1931 film is based on play adaptation by Peggy Webling, rather than the novel itself. Victor's name is changed to Henry, and the creature is named after its master, though it does retain the ability to speak.) Whale's version still managed to horrify audiences, with its unflinching sequences of grave robbery and murder.

... FOR "FRANCHISE FACE-OFFS (PART 14 - 'BATMAN' EDITION)"

He is the antithesis of Superman in almost every way: dark, brooding, prone to violence (all in the name of justice), and powered only by his sheer determination and will. He is a detective, a scientist, a master strategist and multiple martial arts expert. And his rogues' gallery - the Joker, the Riddler, Catwoman, Two-Face, Scarecrow, The Penguin, Poison Ivy, Mr. Freeze - is unprecedented among comic book heroes. Yet despite his accomplishments, despite all his formidable skills, Batman's greatest battle has always been with Hollywood itself.

Bruce Wayne and his menacing alter ego were created, in fact, as a blatant attempt to cash in on Superman's success. The brainchild of 24-year- old artist Bob Kane (with an uncredited assist from writer Bill Finger), "The Bat-Man" made his first appearance in Detective Comics #27 during May of 1939, and was an immediate hit. (National Publications - soon to be known as DC Comics - now had two popular comic book characters under their belt, having also published the monthly adventures of the Man of Steel.) A self-titled series debuted in April 1940, followed by a 15-part film serial starring Lewis Wilson in 1943, followed by a second 15-chapter serial in 1949, starring Robert Lowery as Batman and Johnny Duncan as Robin.

Batman's popularity soared during the late 1960s, when Twentieth Century Fox's high-camp Batman television series premiered in January 1966. It was a tongue-in-cheek parody of superhero tropes, produced by William Dozier and starring Adam West and Burt Ward (plus a bevy of 60's stars as "guest" villains), and it's this incarnation - for better or worse - that defined the character for the next twenty years. No longer a lone, mysterious creature of the night, Bob Kane's creation had now been reduced to a figure of fun, dancing the Batusi and POW! BOFF! and ZWAP!-ing his way through Gotham City while a bright-eyed, green-bootied Boy Wonder spouted catchphrases by his side. This reputation had ingrained itself so much into the public consciousness that Hollywood producers were literally dumbstruck at the idea of bringing Batman back to the screen.

... FOR "WALT DISNEY'S ANIMATED FIFTY (PART 39 - 'DINOSAUR' EDITION)"

My continuing foray into Disney's fifty official Animated Classics. As always, don't hesitate to share your thoughts/memories/complaints in the comments section below. Links to previous entries have also been included below.

Title: Dinosaur (2000)

The Plot: When a meteor collides with Earth, an Iguanodon raised by Lemurs makes the treacherous journey to the "Nesting Grounds" - a mysterious valley believed to be untouched by the devastation.

The Songs: None